pc oct. 5

 SCOTT: LUCY, YOU KNOW,
YOU DON'T HAVE TO BE
A WEATHERMAN TO FIGURE IT OUT.
WE'RE ON THE EAST COAST.
THIS IS HURRICANE SEASON.
 LUCY: YEAH.
IT REALLY LOOKS AWFUL OUT THERE.
 SCOTT: WELL, YOU KNOW WHAT?
WE GOT TO FIND A CLOSET TO WAIT
THIS THING OUT BECAUSE IT COULD
GET WORSE.
 LUCY: NO, YOU KNOW,
THEY DIDN'T MAKE CLOSETS BACK
IN THESE OLD ANTEBELLUM HOMES,
I DON'T THINK.
THEY HAD ARMOIRES OR WARDROBES
OR SOMETHING.
 SCOTT: WELL, I DON'T NEED
AN ARCHITECTURE LESSON RIGHT
NOW, MISS LIBRARIAN.
I'M GOING TO GO CHECK
THE PANTRY.
 SCOTT: LUCY! LUCY!
LUCY, COME ON, ARE YOU ALL
RIGHT?
[SIGMUND QUACKS]
 LUCY: SIGGY, IS THAT YOU?
OOH.
OH, MY.
WHAT IN THE WORLD --
OW.
PIGTAILS.
I HAVE PIGTAILS AND --
AND BOWS?
OH, MY GOODNESS.
SIGGY, I'M DRESSED IN GINGHAM?
I DON'T LIKE GINGHAM.
I CAN'T STAND GINGHAM.
I NEVER WE GINGHAM.
OH, MY.
LOOK AT THIS PLACE.
OH, MY GOODNESS.
WELL, IT'S CERTAINLY
A BIT OVERDONE.
LET'S JUST SAY I WOULDN'T HIRE
THIS DECORATOR.
OH, SIGMUND.
I HAVE A FEELING WE'RE NOT
IN PORT CHARLES ANYMORE.
[SIGMUND QUACKS]
[CAPTIONING MADE POSSIBLE BY
U.S. DEPARTMENT OF EDUCATION]
 LUCY: THAT HOUSE FELL RIGHT
ON TOP OF TH
 SERENA: WAY TO GO!
 CHILDREN: YAY!
 LUCY: OH!
OH, MY GOODNESS.
"WAY TO GO" FOR WHAT?
 SERENA: YOU JUST SQUISHED
THE WICKED HUSSY OF THE EAST.
 LUCY: I DID THAT?
I REALLY DIDN'T MEAN TO HURT
ANYBODY.
 SERENA: SOMETIMES YOU CAN
HURT A PERSON WITHOUT EVEN
TRYING.
 LUCY: THAT'S TRUE.
I'VE CERTAINLY BEEN IN THAT BOAT
BEFORE.
 SERENA: PEOPLE HAVE BEEN
TRYING TO GET RID OF
HER FOREVER.
 LUCY: PEOPLE LIKE ALL
YOU CUTE LITTLE MUNCHKINS?
I DON'T THINK ANY OF YOU WOULD
HURT A FLY.
 SERENA: HERE.
YOU CAN READ ABOUT IT.
IT'S IN THE NEWSPAPER.
 LUCY: OH, WELL, THANK
YOU VERY MUCH.
LET ME SEE THAT.
"BELLS RING AS THE DIMINUTIVE
REPUBLIC CELEBRATES."
[BELL RINGS]
 LUCY: OH.
"GINGHAM GIRL VANQUISHES HUSSY."
[RING]
 LUCY: BOY, THAT COULD GET
REALLY ANNOYING.
"THE LAND OF ODD REJOICES."
[RING]
 LUCY: IS THAT WHERE I AM --
IN THE LAND OF ODD?
 SERENA: WHERE ELSE?
YOU SAVED US ALL.
 LUCY: FROM WHAT?
I DO HAVE TO ADMIT THAT HUSSY
HAS TACKY TASTE, BUT WAS
SHE REALLY THAT BAD?
[ETHEREAL MUSIC PLAYS]
FINALLY BOUGHT THE FARM?
 LUCY: WELL, MANSION,
ACTUALLY.
 SERENA: WELL, THANKS TO HER.
 LUCY: WELL YOU KNOW, I NEVER
QUITE TOOK FLYING LESSONS
WITH AOUSE.
 AUDREY: AH!
DEAD AS A DOORNAIL.
WHAT A FINE JOB YOU DID.
THE ND OF ODD IS ETERNALLY
GRATEFUL TO YOU.
WHAT SIZE SHOE DO YOU WEAR?
 LUCY: WELL, I WEAR A SEVEN,
BUT, YOU KNOW, IF IT'S A REALLY
SNAZZY PAIR, I CAN SQUEEZE
INTO A 6 1/2.
 AUDREY: NO NEED TO CRIMP
YOUR TOES, DEAR.
THE HUSSY WORE A SEVEN, TOO.
YOUR REWARD WILL BE THE GREATEST
PRIZE IN THE KINGDOM -- THE RED
SLUT PUMPS.
 LUCY: OH.
HAND-ME-DOWN HEELS FROM
A CORPSE.
YOU KNOW, THAT DOESN'T SOUND TOO
FUN, SO I'LL JUST PASS.
NO OFFENSE.
 AUDREY: OH, I WOULDN'T BE TOO
HASTY TURNING DOWN THE MAGIC
SLIPPERS.
 LUCY: MAGIC?
 AUDREY: WHOEVER WEARS THESE
PUMPS CAN SNAG THE MAN
OF HER DREAMS.
 LUCY: OH, SIGGY!
SIGGY, DO YOU HEAR THAT?
[SIGMUND QUACKS]
 LUCY: THIS IS OUR TICKET
TO GETTING THE MAN OF OUR DREAMS
BACK.
I'LL TAKE THEM.
 AUDREY: I THOUGHT YOU'D
CHANGE YOUR MIND.
 LUCY: I AM GOING TO TAKE
THESE BABIES FOR A TEST RUN.
OOH.
 SERENA: IT'S THE WICKED HUSSY
OF THE WEST!
 CHILDREN: AH!
 EVE: OH, THIS THINGS NEEDS
A SMOG CHECK.
IS IT TRUE?
DID SOMEONE REALLY KILL
THE WICKED HUSSY OF THE EAST?
 LUCY: WELL, YES, THAT SOMEONE
WOULD BE ME -- AND YOU DON'T
HAVE TO THANK ME, AND NO MORE
PRESENTS, PLEASE.
IT'S ENOUGH THAT I HELPED ALL
THESE LITTLE PEOPLE HERE.
 EVE: MY SISTER'S DEAD BODY
ISN'T EVEN COLD YET AND YOU HAVE
STOLEN THE SHOES FROM HER FEET!
 LUCY: SHE'S YOUR SISTER?
 EVE: SILENCE!
 LUCY: I DIDN'T KNOW.
 EVE: IF YOU KNOW WHAT'S BEST
FOR YOU -- AND OBVIOUSLY
YOU DON'T, JUDGING BY YOUR TASTE
IN CLOTHES -- YOU WILL GIVE ME
BACK THOSE SLUT PUMPS.
 AUDREY: LUCY, DO NOT REMOVE
THE SHOES.
IF THE WICKED HUSSY OF THE WEST
WANTS THEM, THEY MUST BE VERY
POWERFUL.
 EVE: ALL RIGHT, LISTEN,
DEAR ABBY, KNOCK IT OFF,
WILL YOU?
ALL RIGHT, KID, I REALIZE THAT
YOU'RE NEW IN TOWN HERE, SO I'LL
MAKE A DEAL WITH YOU, OK?
YOU GIVE ME BACK THOSE SLUT
PUMPS, AND I WON'T TURN
YOU INTO A BABOON.
 LUCY: WELL, I'LL MAKE A DEAL
WITH YOU.
IF YOU DON'T SKEDADDLE OUT
OF HERE, I'M GOING TO MAKE SURE
THAT SOMEBODY ACCIDENTALLY
ON PURPOSE JUST DROPS A HOUSE
RIGHT ON YOUR HEAD.
 EVE: OH! YOU DEFY ME?
YOU'LL BE SORRY.
 LUCY: HOW DO YOU DO THAT?
OH, WELL.
LISTEN, THIS HAS BEEN SO SWELL,
AND I REALLY DO APPRECIATE
THE FABU SHOES, BUT I REALLY
HAVE TO BE GOING HOME, SO IS
THERE LIKE A TAXI OR A SHUTTLE
OR A BUS OR SOMETHING BACK
TO PORT CHARLES, HUH?
 SERENA: PORT CHARLES?
 AUDREY: I'VE NEVER HEARD
OF IT.
 LUCY: WELL, I THOUGHT
EVERYBODY HAD HEARD
OF PORT CHARLES, HAVEN'T THEY?
 AUDREY: THERE IS ONE MAN WHO
CAN HELP YOU FIND YOUR WAY
HOME -- THE VOODOO DOCTOR
AT EMERALD HOSPITAL.
 LUCY: EMERALD HOSPITAL.
WELL, HOW DO I GET THERE?
 AUDREY: FOOW THE GLITTER
HIGHWAY.
 SERENA: TAKE MY CAR.
IT'S ACROSS THE STREET.
 LUCY: THANK YOU.
OH, I APPRECIATE THIS SO MUCH.
SIGGY, DO YOU HEAR THAT?
WE ARE GOING HOME!
 AUDREY: BACK INTO THE ARMS
OF THE MAN YOU TRULY LOVE.
FOLLOW YOUR HEART, LUCY.
 LUCY: WE'RE OFF TO EMERALD
HOSPITAL.
TA.
TA, EVERYONE.
 CHILDREN and AUDREY: BYE!
 AUDREY: BYE-BYE.
 SERENA: TA.
 AUDREY: BYE-BYE.
 SCOTT: YOU SHOULD'VE SPOKE UP
SOONER, TIN MAN, BEFORE YOU GOT
STIFF.
 KEVIN: I CAN BARELY MOVE
MY MOUTH.
 SCOTT: WELL, THAT'S WHY WE'VE
HAD SUCH PEACE AND QUIET.
 KEVIN: THAT WAS AN EDITORIAL
COMMENT.
 VICTOR: THAT'S NOT GOOD.
HIS JAW IS WORKING AGAIN.
 SCOTT: WELL, NO THANKS
TO YOU, SCAREDY CAT.
 KEVIN: GIVE ME THAT.
 VICTOR: WELL, AT LEAST I CAN
DO LONG DIVISION, STRAW BRAIN.
COME ON! COME ON!
[HORN HONKS]
 LUCY: EXCUSE ME.
OH, EXCUSE ME. HELLO?
 SCOTT: HEY, LAY OFF THE HORN.
 LUCY: WELL, PARDON ME.
[KEVIN WHISTLES]
 LUCY: AND YOU GENTLEMEN CAN
PUT YOUR EYES RIGHT BACK
INTO THOSE SOCKETS OF YOURS.
NOW, I NEED DIRECTIONS
TO EMERALD HOSPITAL.
WHICH WAY SHOULD I GO?
 KEVIN: WELL, ACTUALLY,
WE'RE ALL GOING TO EMERALD
HOSPITAL.
 LUCY: YOU ARE?
WELL, I HOPE YOU'RE NOT SICK.
 KEVIN: JUST A BROKEN HEART.
THEY TELL ME MY HEART WOULD
NEVER MEND, BUT I'M HOPING
TO FALL IN LOVE AGAIN.
 LUCY: OH, THAT IS SO SWEET.
 SCOTT: YOU OW, I HAVE
A SUPERIOR BRAIN.
I NEED STIMULATION ALL THE TIME.
THAT'S WHY I'M GOING TO EMERALD
HOSPITAL -- TO BE STIMULATED.
THAT'S NOT WHAT I MEANT.
 KEVIN: HIS PROBLEM IS
A CLOSED MIND.
 SCOTT: I HAVE AN OPEN MIND,
AS LONG AS EVERYBODY LISTENS
TO ME.
 LUCY: WELL, I CAN SEE THAT
BOTH YOU GENTLEMEN HAVE SOME
ADMIRABLE QUALITIES -- BOTH
OF YOU.
EXCUSE ME.
LION, WHY ARE YOU GOING
TO EMERALD HOSPITAL?
 VICTOR: I'M TRYING TO FIND
THE NERVE TO ASK THIS TIGRESS
OF A NURSE I KNOW FOR A DATE.
 LUCY: OH.
 SCOTT: WHY YOU GOING?
 LUCY: WELL, I'M TRYING
TO FIND MY WAY BACK
TO PORT CHARLES AND GET BACK
TO THE MAN THAT I LOVE.
 KEVIN: HE MUST BE A VERY
SPECIAL MAN TO HAVE A WOMAN LIKE
YOU.
 LUCY: THANK YOU.
 VICTOR: I DON'T SUPPOSE YOU'D
LET US TAG ALONG WITH YOU?
 LUCY: OH.
WELL, WHY NOT.
THE MORE THE MERRIER.
 SCOTT: WELL, WHAT ARE
WEAITING FOR?
 LUCY: THEN WE'RE OFF
TO EMERALD HOSPITAL.
 KEVIN: AH!
 VICTOR: OOH, O, OOH!
 EVE: NOW TRY AND GET OUT
OF THE LAND OF ODD WITH MY SLUT
PUMPS, YOU FARM GIRL!
IF YOU EVER WANT TO GET BACK
TO PORT CHARLES AGAIN, YOU GIVE
ME THOSE SHOES!
 LUCY: I CAN'T GIVE THEM BACK.
THEY'RE THE KEY TO WINNING
MY TRUE LOVE'S HEART.
 EVE: THEY BELONG TO ME.;Y
 LUCY: WELL, YOU DON'T SCARE
ME, YOU FOUL, GAS-BREATH HARLOT.
HMM.
 EVE: WHAT ABOUT LITTLE FLUFFY
HERE?
ARE YOU SCARED FOR HIM, HUH?
 VICTOR: GIVE HER THE SHOES!
GIVE HER THE SHOES!
 LU: OH, ALL RIGHT,
FINE, YOU CAN HAVE THE SHOES.
YOU OBVIOUSLY NEED THEM A LOT
MORE THAN ME BECAUSE YOU CAN'T
GET YOUR OWN MAN ALL ALONE.
 EVE: OW!
CURSES!
THE RHINESTONE CUT MY FINGER.
 LUCY: WELL, YOU KNOW WHAT?
I CAN'T GET THEM OFF MYSELF.
 EVE: THEN WHAT THE GOOD WITCH
SAID WAS TRUE.
THE ONLY WAY TO REMOVE THE SHOES
FROM YOUR FEET
IS IF YOU DIE.
EATING YOUR FAVORITE FOODSCAN BE A REAL PAIN...
WHEN YOU'VE GOT A MOUTH SORE.
YOU NEED ORAJEL MOUTH-AID.
WITH THE MOST MOUTH SORE
PAIN RELIEVER YOU CAN GET.
ORAJEL MOUTH-AID.
WHEN I CUT OFF MY HAIR,
I WANTED IT BACK-- LONG, FAST.
AND IT'S GETTING THERE
WITH PANTENE PRO-V
TREATMENT CONDITIONER.
SPLIT END-FIGHTING POWER,
SO TRIMS CAN LAST LONGER,
LETTING HAIR GROW OUT FASTER.
PANTENE. THE "STRONGER,
LONGER, FASTER" CONDITIONER.
 STATISTICS SHOW
 THAT 40% OF ALL KIDS
 WHO SMOKE MARIJUANA
 LIVE IN THE CITY.
 GUESS WHERE THE OTHER 60% LIVE?
GUESS WHAT !
NEW LOVE MY CARPET
RUG AND ROOM DEODORIZER...
HAS A PATENTED
DIRT RESISTANT FORMULA...
THAT KEEPS CARPETS CLEANER...
AND A LOT MORE ATTRACTIVE.
GET RID OF ODORS
AND KEEP YOUR CARPET CLEANER...
WITH NEW LOVE MY CARPET
FROM WIZARD.
1111
 LUCY: OH, WAIT, WAIT,
WAIT, GUYS, WAIT, PLEASE.
MY FEET ARE KILLING ME.
THAT MUST BE THE WICKED HUSSY'S
PLAN -- TO MAKE ME WALK ALL
THE WAY TO EMERALD HOSPITAL.
THAT'LL BE THE DEATH OF ME
IF I HAVE TO IN THESE SHOES.
OW!
 EVE: FROCKS FOR SALE.
TUPPENCE A FROCK.
 LUCY: WOW.
OH, WHAT ABSOLUTELY LOVELY
MATERIAL.
 EVE: IT AIN'T GINGHAM, BABY.
AND SINCE YOU ARE THE
100th CUSTOMER, IF IT FITS,
IT'S YOURS.
 LUCY: FOR FREE?
 VICTOR: OH, LUCY, YOU CAN'T
BEAT A DEAL LIKE THAT!
 LUCY: I KNOW!
 SCOTT: HEY, WHAT'S THE CATCH?
 EVE: OH, NO CATCH. REALLY.
AND JUST FEEL THE FABRIC.
NOT YOU, FUR BALL!
 LUCY: OH, IT WOULD GO
SO LOVELY WITH MY SNAZZY NEW
PUMPS.
 KEVIN: THIS SMELLS FISHY
TO ME.
 SCOTT: I'M WITH YOU,
TIN HEAD.
LET'S GET OUT OF HERE.
 LUCY: NO, NO, NO.
WAIT, PLEASE. JUST ONE MINUTE.
I SIMPLY MUST TRY THIS ON.
JUST ONE TEENY, TINY MINUTE.
I'LL BE BACK.
 VICTOR: WHAT DOES
THE 101st CUSTOMER GET?
 EVE: HE GETS TO GO
TO THE FUNERAL OF THE
100th CUSTOMER!
 VICTOR: OH! OH!
 KEVIN: LUCY, DON'T PUT
ON THAT DRESS!
 LUCY: HELP ME! HELP ME!
HELP!
[ETHEREAL MUSIC PLAYS]
 SCOTT: DO SOMETHING WITH THAT
AXE YOU'RE ALWAYS GRINDING.
 LUCY: HELP!
I CAN'T BREATHE!
 EVE: I'LL BE BACK.
 AUDREY: THOUGH FANCY
MATERIAL WILL ALWAYS IMPRESS,
COME OUT NOW, LUCY,
WITHOUT THAT DRESS.
 LUCY: OH.
OH, MY.
OH, ME, OH, MY, OH.
OH, THANK YOU.
THANK YOU SO MUCH.
YOU SAVED MY LIFE.
BUT YOU -- YOU TOLD ME ALL I HAD
TO DO WAS FOLLOW THAT PINK
GLITTER HIGHWAY OVER THERE.
 AUDREY: OH, DEAR.
I HAD NO IDEA GETTING TO EMERALD
HOSPITAL WOULD BE SUCH
AN ORDEAL.
I'M HEADING DOWN THAT WAY
ANYWAY.
I'LL TAKE YOU.
 LUCY: YOU COULD'VE TAKEN US
THERE THE WHOLE TIME?
 AUDREY: ALL THE LEARNING
IS IN THE JOURNEY, LUCY.
[ETHEREAL MUSIC PLAYS]
 SCOTT: HEY,
IF THAT VOODOO DOCTOR'S THE BIG
CHIEF, WE MIGHT NEED
AN APPOINTMENT.
 KEVIN: WHAT'S THE MATTER
WITH YOU?
 VICTOR: IT'S THAT NURSE.
THAT TIGRESS I WAS TELLING
YOU ABOUT -- IT'S HER!
 KEVIN: SHE CAN GET US
IN TO SEE THE DOCTOR.
NOW, GO ON, NOW.
GO WORK YOUR CHARMS.
 VICTOR: WHAT CHARMS?
I DON'T HAVE ANY CHARMS.
 SCOTT: MAYBE YOU HAVE
NO GUTS, LION.
 LUCY: OH, HE DOESN'T NEED
GUTS.
A HANDSOME LION LIKE YOU CAN GET
ANY WOMAN YOU WANT.
COME ON.
 VICTOR: YOU THINK?
 LUCY: UH-HUH. I KNOW.
TAKE A DEEP BREATH.
READY? WITH ME.
OOH. GO.
[MARY HISSES]
[VICTOR GROWLS]
[MARY HISSES]
 VICTOR: COULD --
COULD YOU PLEASE DIRECT US
TO THE VOODOO DOCTOR?
 MARY: OH, YOU BET YOUR SWEET
WHISKERS.
HERE HE COMES NOW!
 ALAN: HELLO.
DO YOU HAVE A QUESTION FOR ME?
 SCOTT: YOU ALWAYS WEAR THAT
MAKEUP OUT IN PUBLIC?
 ALAN: YES. GOOD-BYE.
 LUCY: NO, NO, NO, NO.
THAT WASN'T THE QUESTION.
 ALAN: WELL, I CHARGE EXTRA
FOR TWO.
 LUCY: WHATEVER.
LISTEN, I NEED TO GO BACK
TO PORT CHARLES TO GET BACK
TO THE MAN THAT I LOVE,
AND THE GOOD WITCH SAID THAT
YOU COULD HELP US.
 ALAN: YES, BUT FIRST YOU HAVE
TO PROVE YOURSELF WORTHY BEFORE
YOU CAN RETURN HOME.
 SCOTT: WHAT ABOUT THOSE
RHINESTONE PUMPS?
 KEVIN: THOSE COME RIGHT OFF
THE FEET OF THE WICKED HUSSY
OF THEAST.
NOW, DOESN'T THAT PROVE
WORTHINESS?
 ALAN: OH.
KILLING A WICKED HUSSY SHOULD
CERTAINLY COUNT FOR SOMETHING.
BUT I DON'T KNOW WHAT.
ANYWAY, I WANT MORE.
 LUCY: NAME IT.
 ALAN: BRING ME THE
STETHOSCOPE FROM THE WICKED
HUSSY FROM THE WEST AND I WILL
GIVE YOU ANYTHING YOU WANT!
SHE KEEPS IT IN HER BOUDOIR.
NOW, IF YOU'LL EXCUSE ME, I HAVE
PATIENTS TO BILL -- SEE.
 LUCY: WAIT.
HOW DO I STEAL IT?
 ALAN: YOU'RE A CLEVER GIRL.
THINK OF SOMETHING.
 LUCY: OH.
WELL --
 KEVIN: UH, SO -- SO THIS GUY
YOU WANT TO GET BACK
TO IN PORT CHARLES --
HE, UH --
HE MUST BE QUITE A FELLOW.
 LUCY: OH. OH.
YES, HE'S THE BEST, ACTUALLY.
HE'S STRONG AND KIND AND SMART
AND HANDSOME, AND HE MAKES ME
FEEL LIKE I'M THE ONLY GIRL
IN THE WHOLE, WIDE WORLD.
I SIMPLY HAVE TO GET BACK
TO HIM.
 KEVIN: SOUNDS LIKE YOU'RE
SOUL MATES.
 LUCY: I THINK WE ARE.
 SCOTT: IF YOU HAVE SUCH
A TIGHT BOND, WHY ISN'T HE HERE
NOW?
 LUCY: I GUESS I HAD A GOOD
THING AND I DIDN'T REALLY KNOW
I HAD IT AND I JUST LET HIM SLIP
THROUGH MY FINGERS.
 VICTOR: I CAN'T TAKE ANYMORE!
IT'S SO BEAUTIFUL AND SAD!
 LUCY: THAT'S US IN
A NUTSHELL.
 FRANK: HA, HA, HA!
BOO!
GIVE ME THAT BIRD, FUZZ FACE!
 LUCY: OH, NO!
NO, NO, NO, NOT MY SIGGY!
OH, SIGGY!
COME BACK!
SIGGY!
OH! OH! OH!
SIGGY, COME BACK!
WHAT'S THE BEST PART
OF A CARAMEL APPLE?
IF IT'S MADE WITH
HERSHEY'S CLASSIC CARAMEL,
IT'S THE CARAMEL.
HERSHEY'S CLASSIC CARAMELS.
SO SOFT, SO CHEWY
IT'S THE ONLY CARAMEL
GOOD ENOUGH TO
EAT ALL BY ITSELF.
DETERGENTS
WITH BLEACHING ACTION.
THEY CAN FADE COLORS.
BUT THERE IS AN ALTERNATIVE.
CHEER WITH BLEACH ALTERNATIVE.
IT'S BETTER AT PROTECTING COLORS
THAN LEADING REGULAR DETERGENTS
WITH BLEACHING ACTION.
AND IT'S ONE STRONG CLEANER.
ALL-COLOR CHEER
WITH BLEACH ALTERNATIVE.
[ Grunting ]
IT'S SOFT.  IT'S WARM.

AND IT'S
REALLY COMFORTABLE.
[ Snoring ]
NEW CARPET.
 CHRIS: "BRAISED DUCK
BORDEAUX, SMOTHERED UNDER
GLASS."
 FRANK: NO, NO.
FRENCH COOKING IS -- IT'S TOO
RICH.
 CHRIS: OOH.
"CAJUN BLACKENED DUCK WITH DUCK
LIVER ETOUFFEE."
 FRANK: OH, DO WE HAVE TO EAT
THE LIVER?
I LIKE -- LIKE PEKING DUCK.
 EVE: STOP IT!
THIS IS NOT ABOUT THE DUCK.
THE DUCK IS JUST BAIT.
THE REAL GOOSE I WANT COOKED IS
LUCY'S.
 FRANK: PEKING LUCILLE SOUNDS
PRETTY GOOD.
 CHRIS: HEY, YOU KNOW
SOMETHING?
WITH THE RIGHT WINE --
DELICIOUS.
 KEVIN: LION, WE NEED
YOUR HELP!
 LUCY: OH, OH!
 VICTOR: COMING!
DID SOMEONE CALL ME?
 LUCY: OH, PLEASE,
LION, HELP US!
YOU CAN DO IT! YOU CAN DO IT!
 VICTOR: I CAN?
 LUCY: YES, YOU CAN.
OH, HE DID IT!
 SCOTT: I -- I GOT HER.
GET THE STETHOSCOPE!
 LUCY: GO, GO, GO!
 EVE: I'VE NEVER FELT MUSCLES
THIS STRONG.
HOW DO I FEEL TO YOU?
 LUCY: DON'T LISTEN TO HER,
SCARECROW.
SHE IS ONE TRICKY HUSSY.
 SCOTT: THIS FEELS PRETTY
GOOD.
 LUCY: STOP THAT, YOU TWO.
STOP THAT RIGHT NOW.
 KEVIN: LUCY, ANYONE COULD
CONSTRUE YOUR BEHAVIOR
AS AGGRESSIVE-COMPULSIVE
OR AGGRESSIVE-AGGRESSIVE
OR PASSIVE-AGGRESSIVE,
OR ADDICTIVE-COMPULSIVE
AT THE VERY LEAST.
 LUCY: STOP, STOP, STOP.
STOP THAT PSYCHOBABBLE, OK?
HE'S MY FRIEND.
I AM JUST TRYING TO SAVE
MY FRIEND, THAT'S ALL.
OH, BOY.
I GOT TO COOL THE TWO
OF YOU OFF.
HMM!
 EVE: AH!
AH! AH!
OH, LOOK WHAT YOU DID!
ARE YOU HAPPY NOW?
YOU FINALLY GOT THE MAN
OF YOUR DREAMS -- THE SCARECROW!
 LUCY: WHAT DOES SHE KNOW?
 VICTOR: I GOT THE
STETHOSCOPE!
I GOT THE STETHOSCOPE!
 EVE: OH!
OH, I'M MELTING!
OH! OH!
 LUCY: OH, GOODY.
OH, SCARECROW -- OH.
 SCOTT: LUCY, YOU SAVED
MY LIFE.
SHE SVENGALIED ME.
I COULDN'T RESIST HER.
 KEVIN: WELL, LET'S GET
TO THE VOODOO DOCTOR.
LUCY HAS TO GET BACK TO THE MAN
SHE LOVES MOST.
 LUCY: OH.
OH, MY.
 ALAN: MELTING IS AN UGLY WAY
TO GO.
 VICTOR OH, YOU HAVE NO IDEA.
 ALAN: YOU HAVE A LOT
OF DETERMINATION.
I LIKE THAT IN A WOMAN.
REMINDS ME OF ONE OF
MY EX-WIVES.
I'M ALWAYS HAPPY TO SEE SOMEONE
FIND THEIR HEART'S DESIRES.
 LUCY: REUNITING WITH MY TRUE
LOVE FITS THE BILL.
 ALAN: THEN IT SHALL BE SO.
SO SAY GOOD-BYE.
 LUCY: GOOD-BYE.
 ALAN: GOOD-BYE.
 LUCY: GOOD-BYE.
OH.
OH, MY.
OH, MY.
WELL, THANK YOU.
YOU'RE NOT ONLY A GOOD WITCH,
YOU'RE THE BEST OF ALL.
OH.
AND LION --
OH, LION, YOU ARE MORE THAN
BRAVE.
YOU DEFINE COURAGE.
OH, OH.
TIN MAN,
I SO HOPE WE CAN STILL BE
FRIENDS.
 KEVIN: GOOD LUCK WITH THAT
MAN YOU LOVE.
 LUCY: OH.
 KEVIN: ARE YOU OK?
 LUCY: THAT KISS JUST REMINDED
ME OF SOMEONE.
OH, AND YOU.
 SCOTT: PLEASE DON'T GO.
I LIKE HAVING YOU AROUND.
 LUCY: I HAVE TO.
 SCOTT: BUT YOU CARE ABOUT ME
MORE THAN YOU KNOW.
THAT WARNING TO STAY AWAY
FROM THE HUSSY?
IT'S BECAUSE YOU WANT ME
FOR YOURSELF.
 LUCY: OH --
 SCOTT: YOU'RE SAFE,
YOU'RE SAFE.
IT'S ALL RIGHT.
YOU'RE OK.
LISTEN,
DON'T LEAVE ME LIKE THAT, OK?
I NEED YOU.
I NEED YOU.
COME HERE.